Hanging In there
Dec. 19th, 2023 07:33 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
alicevangelineI'm basically recovered from the panic and despair and paranoia getting to me, which is fantastic. I'm back to regular ol' 'life is stressful sometimes' drama.
I have a work situation with an unhoused family that's stressing me out for various reasons - the 'i don't know how to help them, procedurally' and the bigger 'turns out i do know the supports and they're all full because we have massive structural problems' and the 'landlord seems to be screwing this family over' issues and the 'am I allowed to do xyz to help them?' mixed with the general empathy of it and the whole 'one of the kids is breaking out in stress hives from it all.'
so this is a thing I will learn to navigate: how to compartmentalize the compassion on that, and accept when I've reached the limits of what I can do. (I am trying to find out WHERE they are at this time - I can stay within them once they're found.)
--
I wouldn't be doing the work if I didn't care, so the compassion and worry are probably going to be there anyway. Weirdly, I have more practice with that limit-finding because of when my parents were drinking. (Now, I don't think this family and the others I'm working with are making poor choices, i think it's one damn thing after another happening TO them, but I don't know that for a fact). It's not a perfect metaphor, but i had the practice in choosing to put the Caring aside for a little while. I still loved my parents, but I could NOT worry about them any further and had to start feeling the 'not my problem' vibe to protect my own heart.
So I do know how to do that, but it takes some psychic energy.
-
Which is currently a bit drained because Meg is not quite right - still sick and sad all the time and disassocating a little (things not feeling real). I don't know what to do about that, but I am taking her to psychiatrist for med management thursday (or maybe I can get dan to do that). My thursday is bonkers so I'm not doing it. I did reschedule her dentist appointment for illness reasons. I think the Sick and Sad are two different things. the Sick is a cold that's lingering, and the Sad is always there - that's the problem - it's anxiety/depression, and I'm not sure if the prednisone for her cough is a factor in making it worse. I'm not sure if her medication is right, and how much of it is puberty nonsense.
--
i told her she WILL Get Better someday.
Two things I can do to help life feel more manageable in the meantime are a) activate 504 plan since she no longer has IEP and b) see about any supports for gifted/talented students. She is BORED in her classes. I'm aware how limited our schools' resources are, though, so....there might not be much there.
I have a work situation with an unhoused family that's stressing me out for various reasons - the 'i don't know how to help them, procedurally' and the bigger 'turns out i do know the supports and they're all full because we have massive structural problems' and the 'landlord seems to be screwing this family over' issues and the 'am I allowed to do xyz to help them?' mixed with the general empathy of it and the whole 'one of the kids is breaking out in stress hives from it all.'
so this is a thing I will learn to navigate: how to compartmentalize the compassion on that, and accept when I've reached the limits of what I can do. (I am trying to find out WHERE they are at this time - I can stay within them once they're found.)
--
I wouldn't be doing the work if I didn't care, so the compassion and worry are probably going to be there anyway. Weirdly, I have more practice with that limit-finding because of when my parents were drinking. (Now, I don't think this family and the others I'm working with are making poor choices, i think it's one damn thing after another happening TO them, but I don't know that for a fact). It's not a perfect metaphor, but i had the practice in choosing to put the Caring aside for a little while. I still loved my parents, but I could NOT worry about them any further and had to start feeling the 'not my problem' vibe to protect my own heart.
So I do know how to do that, but it takes some psychic energy.
-
Which is currently a bit drained because Meg is not quite right - still sick and sad all the time and disassocating a little (things not feeling real). I don't know what to do about that, but I am taking her to psychiatrist for med management thursday (or maybe I can get dan to do that). My thursday is bonkers so I'm not doing it. I did reschedule her dentist appointment for illness reasons. I think the Sick and Sad are two different things. the Sick is a cold that's lingering, and the Sad is always there - that's the problem - it's anxiety/depression, and I'm not sure if the prednisone for her cough is a factor in making it worse. I'm not sure if her medication is right, and how much of it is puberty nonsense.
--
i told her she WILL Get Better someday.
Two things I can do to help life feel more manageable in the meantime are a) activate 504 plan since she no longer has IEP and b) see about any supports for gifted/talented students. She is BORED in her classes. I'm aware how limited our schools' resources are, though, so....there might not be much there.
no subject
Date: 2023-12-19 05:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2023-12-20 12:33 pm (UTC)